1.a

Deciding to learn to build houses - making a book of all the things I learn
-self-sufficiency, learning shelterbuilding and gardening (apocalypse prepper vibe also)
- something that makes me feel calmer - a plan for the future that I can believe in - discussing it with mum+ getting her support on learning this helped me feel calmer about it
- rethinking future plans (see list novemer) - to spend a life learning skills through helping others (eg woofing), learning useful skills which could share with others in the future - being=with-others
- relation to sympoeisis (see pt.3) - thinking over this, is learning shelter building learning to be-with? or is it learning to be separate? does learning to be-wth allow of private spaces (if) they are an emotional need? - the self care of having your own space

Helping Kemi and Niko & Co. build a giant bower for the NZ Festival - secret huts around and outside Wellington, with a map to help people find them, working with the communities they’re situated in to help learn to build and maintain after the project, each hut has a story hidden inside it by a local writer

1.b

Little Paradise Lodge, near Queenstown
- a strange little house we came across on drive across the country - not only functional houses - seeing magic of gardens, using the whole space you live in

On the Routeburn walk: tiny shelters in trees, places I would dwell

1.c

Building shelters in relation to the self-building culture of NZ (saw so many huts driving through the country)

Te Papa Museum
Maps showing land stolen from Maori by European settlers

Attitudes to Land, Neil Challenger
Discussions around Maori relationship with land
Thinking about building shelters on owned land/ as opposed to the way Maori relate to land

2.

driving for days through the south island with my mum at the beginning of the month - and then again in the last 4 days of the month, this time with someone at first a stranger.

choosing music in reaction to the places we were driving through, like film soundtracks.
feeling calmest when in movement (backseat of cars, places to be fully bored + still + unproductive - places that clarity of thought comes)

Being in unpeopled landscapes - not tied to structures of language or movement
Routeburn 3 day walk = everything has got in balance with each other in the absence of people

3.

Staying with the Trouble - Sympoeisis

‘Critters do not precede their relatings’
reseeing the world
wonder
Rethinking previous point, not separating people/ not people so much
Seeing outside units and relations, especially competitive relations
Rethinking ‘the Modern Synthesis’ and science theories from the 1800s, similar period as in point 4

4.

The Luminaries

East of Eden

Thinking about the ‘settler’ era - Colonial 1800s era - one of the start time periods that resulted in the mess of now
Seeing link between gold rush miners in South Coast of NZ (which I was in as I was reading this), making towns so quickly and seeing land as ‘free’ with the California land stealers of Steinbeck’s book - and how differently the two situations are written (The Luminaries was written 7 years ago, East of Eden 63) (helped along by Paul Beatty’s ‘The Sellout’)
also trying to figure out how this country is seen from multiple viewpoints and times

5.

Trying to exist in the unknown city after open landscape adventures

thinking of making a list of things that mention homesickness, a feeling that is best when shared

Slossy - Lumpovanje (feel free) - relistening as I got an ipod and can listen while I’m walking around - makes me feel connected to home/ things I have found exciting there; self-assured, knowing who I am;
had the ‘freeeeeee’ part stuck in my head for days - always liked how this seemed to show you can put any words into a song, feelings that might seem obvious (wanting to feel free) given validity

-starts at 9.32-
re-found this which stuck with me ever since it was performed - both in ways of dancing and connecting freedom of movement with freedom of language (both coming about in unpeopled landscapes); wondering whether sincere/ free expression is a justifiable point of focus/ an existant thing

Learning the existence of power positions before interviews (Lilli and a stranger’s advice); learning first through the body - body shapes make moods.
Learning how to be respectful and take up space at the same time; learning how to exist in the city streets

5.a

5.b

5.c